The Kingdom Hearts games thus far have been quite the ride, but with the recent disappointing release of the Re Mind DLC, it’s time we look at what and where things went wrong.
It seems as though the Kingdom Hearts series was discovered by many in the same way: it was a magical, accidental, and wonderful experience that was nothing like we expected it to be.
For me, that discovery came in the Walmart game department. It released when I was in middle school, so seeing a really cool game on a store shelf that was still rated E for Everyone was a diamond in the rough.
Kingdom Hearts 1 was a tough game. Playing through it as a ten-year-old was incredibly rewarding, mostly because it was so cool to play through some of my favorite Disney movies.
It got even cooler when the world of Final Fantasy met Disney. Merlin was teaching me epic magic spells, Fairy Godmother was recovering summons for me, and Hades was pitting me against Final Fantasy VII mega antagonist Sephiroth — all while Donald Duck and Goofy Goof quacked and guffawed along the way.
It’s nothing less than a miracle that this peanut butter and chocolate combo tastes nothing like orange juice and toothpaste. Kingdom Hearts 1 is an amazing start to the series, and sets up just enough lore to keep me wanting more. Specifically, Kingdom Hearts 2, at this point, is the more that I want.
Honestly, the middle game Chain of Memories is one of my favorite KH titles. The KH series translated beautifully onto Nintendo’s Game Boy Advance, with the unique card battle system giving this game reason, purpose, and complexity.
Those that skipped Chain of Memories were really, really confused come the start of Kingdom Hearts 2. I ate it all up and was mega excited to see what was going to happen with Roxas, Namine, and Axel. These characters were great additions in Chain of Memories (though Roxas made his debut in KH2), and made me feel even more interested in what was coming down the pipeline for Sora.
Sora waking up a year later, looking taller, older, and donning a much less silly costume drove the narrative of the definitive best game in the Kingdom Hearts series. I’ve often referenced how the pacing of KH2 lends to it being the best of the series, as its mid-game finale gave the story a purpose and drive that would later be left out in future entries.
Enter 358/2 Days. While Chain of Memories felt like a natural, smooth inclusion on the Game Boy Advance, the Nintendo DS’s 358 felt like a convoluted mess. Its storytelling, focused on Roxas’ time in the Organization, was disjointed as all hell.
358 attempted to play as a full 3D adventure, but Super Mario 64 DS, it was a not. It wasn’t fun to explore the game’s worlds, as you were mostly tasked with completing small missions, as opposed to playing through the entirety of the world.
For the first time in the series, the Kingdom Hearts team had produced a title that was dry, tasteless, and dare I say, heartless. The biggest sin here was that there was so much heart put into the development of each Organization member’s unique playstyle, but there wasn’t really a point to playing as them in the postgame missions.
Sweeping me off my feet, Birth by Sleep finally gave me a reason to turn on my PSP. It… was also disjointed and odd, but it was still leagues above 358 (the bar was low). Aqua was a compelling protagonist, but diet Riku and diet Roxas were shells. Playing through the same worlds… three times in a row was a chore, but Aqua’s arc made it all worth it. And plus, we were bound to see Kingdom Hearts 3 next, right? Riiiight?
Oh ho ho, wrong.
Kingdom Hearts Re:coded is the Kingdom Hearts game that shall not be named. I’ll keep it simple: you’re tasked with playing through the same six worlds from KH1 and Chain of Memories. There’s another Sora, another (ANOTHER) Riku, and way too little important plot. This game somehow set the bar even lower than 358. And still, no KH3 announcement.
Out crawls the latest Nintendo handheld Kingdom Hearts game in Dream Drop Distance. Again, AGAIN, we’re forced to play through each world multiple times. This is done right with a continued plot in KH2’s worlds, but come Dream Drop, the dual-timeline BBS approach is no longer interesting.
The flowmotion and Young Master Xehanort arc mattered loads more than Re:coded’s gameplay and plot, but they quickly dissolved into further mess. All of a sudden, we were time traveling, dreaming, diving, and dropping lore when we felt like it, and changing continuity as we pleased.
I wish I was making up the next title’s name, but I’m not. Kingdom Hearts 0.2 Birth By Sleep: A Fragmentary Passage was meant to make me excited for Kingdom Hearts 3’s imminent release, but by this point, I was dragging my feet. Not even Aqua could get me hyped for this mini entry. If I was naming it, I would have subtitled this game Kingdom Hearts 3.64: Cash Grabbing Darkness.
Then, Kingdom Hearts 3 released. I picked myself back up again, enjoyed KH3 for what it had to offer, and decided that, you know what? Maybe I was done with Kingdom Hearts for a while. As they say, get out while the getting’s still good.
RE: The Re Mind DLC. It’s as if the KH development team took everything wrong with the series and turned it up to 100. Time travel? Check. Not enough new gameplay to justify the MSRP? Check. Repeating previous plot with tiny changes as an excuse to define this as “DLC”? Check check check.
Re Mind broke me. I care about Yozora, but I wish I didn’t. Just… whatever, Disney/Square Enix. You’ve had me in the palm of your hands for some time now, and I’ll play/watch/dream/sleep/memorize anything you throw at me. But that doesn’t mean I’ll be happy about it.
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