April Fools!

With HBO’s Game of Thrones set to spoil the book series, George R.R. Martin questions whether anyone would even bother to read The Winds of Winter.

When it became apparent that the HBO adaptation of Game of Thrones would wrap up before George R.R. Martin finished A Song of Ice and Fire, the creators had an important decision to make: would they devise a different ending for the series, or would they build on Martin’s original plan for A Dream of Spring, the still-unwritten final book in the saga?

In March 2015, it was announced that David Benioff and D.B. Weiss would indeed be spoiling the ASOIAF series in their show.

Unfortunately, this isn’t the last piece of bad news for fans of Martin’s book series. Speaking candidly about the situation for the first time, the 66-year-old author admits that he’s actually pretty relieved about HBO’s decision.

“Now I don’t have to write the final book at all if I don’t feel like it!” Martin chuckles darkly, as the “Rains of Castamere” begins to play in the background.

The author further admits that he has actually been struggling with writer’s block for the past few years, which is why The Winds of Winter has been so long in the making.

“I write about three words a day,” Martin reveals. “And after four excruciating years, I’m actually almost done with my first draft. But ever since I killed off Arya and Tyrion in that massacre at the start of the book, I began to feel like it just didn’t flow right.” Martin pauses thoughtfully, and takes a moment to adjust his trademark suspenders. “I mean, I might just start over now. Who cares? The show will reveal everything anyway. Fans can wait another 10 years for this book.”

And with Game of Thrones potentially delivering a slam-dunk finale, “I might never finish ASOIAF at all. Why ruin a good thing?” Martin giggles. “If the showrunners do a good job, I don’t have to do mine! And I actually have a great idea for a new detective series. Steampunk, time travel, a talking fox… I’ve got a good feeling about this one.”

Of course, even if the show’s finale is amazing, it still won’t answer all the questions book fans have after reading the first five installments. Martin is well-aware of this. “I know there’s obviously going to be some unanswered questions,” he says. “And I’ll probably end up revealing some of those online. Like, take Jon Snow’s parentage. That was never going to matter to the story anyway. Hell, I’ll tell you right now. Nobody will believe that he’s actually the brother of–”

Unfortunately, the “Rains of Castamere” theme was playing so loudly at this point, we couldn’t hear the rest of his sentence.

Cheers to you, George.

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