What’s all the fuss about? It’s season 6 prediction time!

A couple of weeks ago, ITV finally dropped the Downton Abbey trailer, breaking our hearts as we contemplated the end of our favorite British soap. And with the one-minute trailer bringing not only Downton’s audience, but its very residents to tears, our minds started spinning at all of the upcoming possibilities. What dramatic events are leaving everyone at Downton Abbey crying?

With only a week to go until the premiere of Downton Abbey’s final season, we’re dissecting the series 6 trailer to try and figure out what surprises (and inevitabilities) are in store for us this year.

Robert loses everyone’s money… again.

Spoiler alert: he actually singlehandedly causes the Stock Market Crash of 1929.

So they have to close Downton’s doors for good.

Carson and Mrs. Hughes can turn it into a five star bed and breakfast.

And the servants get jobs where they don’t have to dress grown adults.

Considering they are neither dolls nor infants, the Crawley’s should be just fine dressing themselves.

So Carson and Mrs. Hughes get married in a wedding that is just too precious to handle.

The reception is in the servant’s quarters obviously, because Carson thinks it is just plain tacky to let the middle class roam around upstairs. Lady Mary is the best man but she forgets the ring because she’s not used to being responsible for other human beings.

Inspired by love, Thomas finally gets a super fly boyfriend who appreciates the complexity of his character.

It’s about time our favorite evil butler gets some.

Edith also gets a boyfriend, but because she is Edith, he dies and/or loses a limb.

Sorry, Edith.

Anna finds out she is pregnant!

Maybe she will start a fashionable new trend at Downton and actually raise her own child?

But surprise: Bates is a serial killer.

He killed his wife. And everyone else’s wife, too. I hear your foreshadowing creepy piano chords!

But bigger surprise: Anna also reveals she is a serial killer.

She was way too chill about that dead Turkish man in Mary’s bed.

It’s fine, all is good because Daisy is going to buy the farm.

In our favorite plot twist, we find out that Daisy’s learning has made her the only person qualified to accurately read bank statements or count money. She decides to pull from her IRA fund and invest in a bankrupt Downton as a pet project after the overwhelming success she has had exploiting Mr. Mason’s “organic” produce to all the 1920’s Lost Generation hipsters.

And Mary finally comes to her senses and runs off to America to elope with Branson.

Spinoff!!!

While the Dowager continues to complain about the Greatest Generation’s total lack of class.

These girls are so trashy with their bare ankles and free ribcages.

Oh, and somebody dies.

Somebody always dies.

What do you predict will happen in season 6 of ‘Downton Abbey’?

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