Actor Tracy Morgan appeared on NBC’s Today Show this morning to discuss the June 2014 crash that seriously injured the comedian and killed one of his friends.

“I can’t believe I’m here,” Morgan tearfully said to Today anchor Matt Lauer at the top of the interview. Even a year later, Morgan was still very shaken by what happened — he had tears in his eyes during the entire eight-minute segment. Notably, Lauer didn’t shy away from asking the tough questions despite Morgan’s emotional state.

“I’ve been down. I have my family. I have my wife, Megan. We’re about to be married. I have my daughter and my son, so they help me get my spirits up,” he said of his current condition.

Morgan and Wal-mart, the company whose truck was responsible for the crash, recently settled the case, which Morgan described as a “tremendous” move. However, “the pain is always going to be there for Jimmy Mack,” he said of his friend who died that night. “He’s a close friend of mine, a comrade in comedy. He was a loving man, a warm man.”

Interestingly, Morgan said he took an interest in watching the crash and his friend’s funeral after he got out of his two-week coma. “When I got home, it really hit me. Every day I would watch the accident on YouTube. One day I came across his funeral on YouTube and I lost it for about a week.”

Asked why he would watch the crash that caused him such pain and loss, Morgan said, “I had to know what happened to my friend. I had to know and I had to pay my respects, and that was my way.”

Watch the emotional interview below:

Morgan said he’s still suffering. “There are times where I have my good days and my bad days, where I forget things. There are times where I get the headaches and the nosebleeds. I don’t let my lady know because I don’t want her to be worried about it.” He also told an inspirational story about a nurse who took care of him after he woke up from his coma.

As for the future, the comedian hopes to return one day, but only after he fully recovers. “I love comedy. I’ll never stop loving her. I can’t wait to get back to her, but my goal right now is just to heal, because I’m not 100% yet. And when I’m there, you’ll know it. I’ll get back to making you laugh.”

Hours after his interview, Morgan sent out his first tweet since the crash: