These Ron Weasley quotes don’t just prove that he’s the King of witty one-liners, he’s also the heart of the Harry Potter trio.
Ron Weasley may not be the Chosen One, nor the brightest wizard of his age, but he’s just as much an integral part of the trio as Harry and Hermione. Often touted ‘the funny one,’ but his humor shouldn’t be so carelessly dismissed. Ron isn’t just ‘funny,’ he has an ability to ease tension in a way Harry and Hermione aren’t capable of. He provides much-needed levity at times when it’s desperately needed, else the trio, and readers, would get too weighed down in tragedy.
Related: Thirteen reasons why we love Ron Weasley no matter what anybody says
Humor also isn’t the only thing Ron brings to the trio. What’s often overlooked is Ron’s heart. He’s loyal and supportive of those he loves, and would never let any harm come to them. Ron doesn’t just have a funny bone, he has a loving heart.
To celebrate Ron’s existence (and his birthday), here are 25 of our favorite Ron Weasley quotes.
- “Lockhart’ll sign anything if it stands still long enough.”
– Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets, The Rogue Bludger - “There’s a time and a place for getting a smart mouth.”
– Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows, The Lost Diadem - “If you want to kill Harry, you’ll have to kill us too!”
– Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban, Cat, Rat, and Dog - “Maybe he murdered Myrtle; that would’ve done everyone a favor…”
– Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets, The Very Secret Diary - “What’s that?” said Ron, pointing at a large dish of some sort of shellfish stew that stood beside a large steak-and-kidney pudding.
“Bouillabaisse,” said Hermione.
“Bless you,” said Ron.
– Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire, The Goblet of Fire - “IF WE DIE FOR THEM, I’LL KILL YOU, HARRY!”
– Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows, The Battle of Hogwarts - “They didn’t look anything like hats to me, more like woolly bladders.”
– Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix, Detention With Dolores - “It’s the only way… I’ve got to be taken.”
– Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone, Through the Trapdoor - “If he doesn’t stop trying to save your life he’s going to kill you.”
– Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets, The Dueling Club - “We’re with you whatever happens.”
– Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince, The White Tomb - “I’d hate to see what the Ministry’d do to me if I blew up an aunt. Mind you, they’d have to dig me up first, because Mum would’ve killed me.”
– Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban, The Leaky Cauldron - “Why are they all staring?” demanded Albus as he and Rose craned around to look at the other students.
“Don’t let it worry you,” said Ron. “It’s me. I’m extremely famous.”
– Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows, Nineteen Years Later - “One person can’t feel all that at once, they’d explode.”
– Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix, The Eye of the Snake - “Yeah, I’ve seen those things they think are gnomes,” said Ron, bent double with his head in a peony bush, “like fat little Santa Clauses with fishing rods…”
– Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets, The Burrow - “Can I have a look at Uranus too, Lavender?”
– Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire, Mad-Eye Moody - “It’s a damn sight harder making stuff up when you’re under stress than you’d think.”
– Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows, The Deathly Hallows - “And Neville will play Quidditch for England before Hagrid lets Dumbledore down.”
– Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone, Through the Trapdoor -
“Can you believe our luck?” said Ron miserably, bending down to pick up Scabbers. “Of all the trees we could’ve hit, we had to get one that hits back.”
– Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets, The Whomping Willow - “Harry, you’ve got to come and stay with us. I’ll fix it up with Mum and Dad, then I’ll call you. I know how to use a fellytone now.”
– Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban, Owl Post Again - “Hang on a moment!” said Ron sharply. “We’ve forgotten someone!”
“Who?” asked Hermione.
“The house-elves, they’ll all be down in the kitchen, won’t they?”
“You mean we ought to get them fighting?” asked Harry.
“No,” said Ron seriously, “I mean we should tell them to get out. We don’t want any more Dobbies, do we? We can’t order them to die for us —”
– Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows, The Battle of Hogwarts - “Mum, d’you honestly think You-Know-Who’s going to be hiding behind a bookshelf in Flourish and Blotts?”
– Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince, Draco’s Detour - “Percy wouldn’t recognize a joke if it danced naked in front of him wearing Dobby’s tea cozy.”
– Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire, The House-Elf Liberation Front - “If you’re not in Gryffindor, we’ll disinherit you,” said Ron, “but no pressure.”
– Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows, Nineteen Years Later - Don’t let the Muggles get you down!
– Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban, Owl Post - “Poisonous toadstools don’t change their spots.”
– Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix, Professor Umbridge
