Riverdale season 4, episode 17, “Wicked Little Town,” was music to our ears.

We sang, we danced, we laughed, we cried, we raged, we cheered…yup, sounds like a Riverdale musical episode. And just like any Riverdale musical episode, there were very few plot points, but those few were extremely important.

In general, I liked the musical elements of Riverdale season 4, episode 17 even more than the “Carrie” and “Heathers” musicals. The costumes were loud and amazing, the performances were incredible, and the songs and choreography were energetic, fun, and heartfelt. It was a total blast.

Kevin Keller, portrayed by Casey Cott, was such a star in this episode of Riverdale. I’ve been missing Kevin so much this season, and I’ve really been looking forward to the musical episode to see him shine. Well, shine he did. More than I ever could have hoped for.

It finally felt like Kevin was back. I love that he acknowledged that things have been different for him since the Farm, and that the variety show was helping him feel normal again. It was so sweet of the girls and the Archies to help him live his dream of performing Hedwig, and I really hope this leads to Kevin being more involved in the rest of Riverdale season 4. Especially with how supportive Fangs was. I need to see more of them outside of tickle porn!

Well, there’s no use ignoring the elephant in the room any longer. It’s time to talk about “the origins of love,” or whatever you want to call it.

I’m not going to waste much time talking about the fights between Varchie and Bughead, because everyone, including the characters involved, knows they were bullshit. Obviously Archie couldn’t have “pushed Hiram to the hospital,” and we’re not sure why he would, and Betty and Jughead would’ve gotten over their spat in an hour max. They were nothing.

Nothing.

And even if they were something, those fights plus a short and scattered montage of moments from three years ago absolutely do not justify jeopardizing two perfectly solid relationships for that kiss. It makes so sense, it wasn’t earned, and I really, really don’t like it. This was a Riverdale musical episode, and that kiss was the thing that made the least sense. That’s not good.

Sure, Riverdale has been planting the Barchie seeds for a few weeks now, but those seeds pretty much get washed away every time we see a strong Varchie or Bughead moment. They weren’t even close to enough to justify the amount of turmoil we’re now going to have to endure for the rest of Riverdale season 4.

If they wanted to explore Barchie, they should have explored it. It doesn’t work when you just jump into a new relationship that will ruin the core four as a result of two characters getting caught up in the music.

It broke my heart when Jughead came to deliver his essay to Betty. It was clear how gross and heartbroken Betty felt at what she’d done, and what it could mean for her future. Archie’s anger was equally tangible and sickening.

All we can hope for now is that they’re honest with their partners sooner than later, so we can start to deal with the fallout of this. The longer they wait, the worse it’s going to be, and the more angry I’m going to be about it. Ugh.

In the second and final plot point of Riverdale season 4, episode 17 (lol), the creepy videos are back. Can we just take a second to laugh at the fact that the characters who weren’t cool enough to get a video delivered to their house went to Pop’s to watch his before things get serious? Okay, second of laughter complete.

Charles is dropping creepy and ominous hints like “I don’t ever want to see what would happen if he found his way inside a house,” but nobody’s picking up what he’s laying down. However, if Jughead is really giving the videos his full attention, hopefully he’ll get suspicious of his big bro soon.

I’m honestly not sure if the weird Betty beating Jughead video was real or if Jughead just imagined it because he was picking up weird vibes. If it’s real, the cinematographer is getting creative, which is interesting. If it’s fake, then I’m still just mad about the kiss. That’s all.

That’s almost it for this week. However, since it’s Riverdale’s senior year, each week I will be giving out some yearbook superlatives for the episode. This week with a “Hedwig” twist. Check them out here!

‘Riverdale’ season 4, episode 17 awards

Best dressed: Kevin Keller in absolutely every number
Best choreography: “Random Number Generation”
Most delightfully random musical number: “Wig in a Box”
Sexiest musical number: “Sugar Daddy.” They definitely proved Principal Honey’s point with this one.
Best musical number: “The Origin of Love.” Everyone was giving it their all.
Worst musical number: “Exquisite Corpse.” It was cool to hear everyone rock out, but otherwise…I’ll pass.
Most emotional musical number: “Midnight Radio.” For better and for worse.