Pokémon Go is out now and everyone is playing it… You know, except for MOST OF THE WORLD, because we’re still waiting for it to be released!
Last Wednesday, Nintendo and Niantic surprised us all by quietly launching Pokémon Go in select countries. Like most new apps, the game was first made available in New Zealand, and soon it popped up in Australia and the U.S.
Now the rest of us get to see you lucky SOBs become Gym Masters and break the law and find dead bodies and all the other crazy sh** Pokémon Go has opened the floodgates for, while just waiting for what feels like forever until we finally get to play it ourselves.
It seems like Pokémon Go will finally be released worldwide within the next few days, but until it actually happens, we’ve got two options: Download the game illegally and risk malware/a lifetime ban, or shout our frustration into the digital void. Let’s see what’s behind door number 2.
1. Excitement
OH MY GOD! Pokémon Go is trending! People are playing it! IT’S FINALLY HERE!
*checks App Store*
*refreshes*
*refreshes again*
…
2. Confusion
Ohhh I see, it’s only out in New Zealand. WAIT. Now America has it? Where’s the game? WHY ISN’T IT SHOWING UP IN MY APP STORE!?
3. Bargaining
Okay. It’s fine. Nintendo is just ironing out a few bugs before releasing it over here, that’s a good thing.
It’ll be here soon.
Everything is fine.
*checks App Store for the 15th time… this morning*
4. Annoyance
I swear Andrew if I have to read one more tweet about your dog playing Pokémon Go before I get to try it…
5. Anger
WHY THE HELL ISN’T IT HERE YET EFF YOU NINTENDO IT’S NOT ALL ABOUT AMERICA!!!!
*deletes social media and blocks anyone who talks about playing the game*
6. Depression
I should have known it was too good to be true. It’s never coming to Europe.
This is the Wizarding World theme park all over again.
*cries into Pikachu body pillow*
7. Impatience
Surely it must be out by now.
*checks App Store*
8. Impatience
*checks App Store*
9. Impatience
*checks App Store*
10. Lethargy
What’s the point of even getting out of bed if not to catch Pokémon? What’s the point of ANYTHING? ?
11. Acceptance
I guess there’s nothing to do but wait…
…JUST KIDDING. There is no acceptance until I get my hands on this damn game.