Holy crap, the media is trying to get away again with these “new Harry Potter stories!!!” headlines.

If you’ve perused Facebook or Twitter this afternoon, you’ve probably seen a couple of stories that look like this:

And there are plenty more, but my eyes and soul can only handle so many (Two. Just two.) per 24-hour period.

These headlines and their attached remarks aren’t true.

The truth: Beginning next week, Pottermore will be sharing “daily festive surprises” ranging from Rowling’s thoughts on Draco Malfoy to new potions to play with in that area of the site.

Does this feel like déjà vu? If so, that’s because it’s happened before.

At some point in 2014 the media realized that they could deceivingly spin “new updates to Pottermore” into — and I’m paraphrasing — “J.K. Rowling just wrote a new Harry Potter book!!!” This is at least the fourth time in 2014 that this has happened.

This nonsense has to stop. The two Facebook posts and their respective headlines are particularly troublesome because they’re 100% inaccurate.

What’s also confusing is the fact that sites like EW, TIME, Vulture, etc. are not always so misleading, so I’m not sure what’s happening here. Do they genuinely believe that these are accurate reports? When combined, these outlets reach tens of millions of people.

What happens when this whole Christmas thing on Pottermore starts next week? For example, when Pottermore releases the two new potions they promised, will we see a new article from EW that actually calls the extra two potions in Pottermore something like, “J.K. Rowling reveals a new story on two potions!”?

The next time your friend shares one of these stories and gets super excited, do the internet a favor and break their heart. Tell them the truth. They deserve to be informed.

I’d ask you to share our story, but then I’d be stooping down to the level from which TIME and EW are waving to you.

At this point I can’t wait for Pottermore to finish releasing all this stuff so we can stop seeing such misleading content.

I also can’t wait for this to stop bothering me so much. Ugh.