Jess tried a new way to date on New Girl season 4, episode 2, “Dice.” Find out what happened with our recap!
Schmidt strikes gold with a new dating app on his phone called Dice and Jess wants in on it. He warns her that she’ll get eaten alive on it, but makes the mistake of showing her how it works. Jess immediately makes an account for herself.
At the bar, Winston tells everyone he’s not clicking with his fellow cadets at the police academy. He’s jealous that everyone has nicknames but himself. Cece suggests he just invites herself along on their plans. Winston thinks that’s rude though.
When Winston heads off to the bathroom, the gang laments that once Winston is a cop they will have to behave. Coach admits that he’s never been high before. So obviously they all decide they will spend the afternoon teaching him how.
Before they can leave, though, Schmidt gets a call from Jess needing a ride. Once they’re back home, Schmidt is furious with her. After describing what happened, Jess admits that she’s not ready for Dice yet. So she begs Schmidt to teach her how.
Schmidt’s teaching methods are unorthodox. He puts out notebooks and then yells at Jess for taking notes. Tells her a tip and says to write it down. When she gets a match on Dice, he throws her phone on the floor.
Winston gets invited to a party and invites Nick, Cece, and Coach along. What he doesn’t know is that they’re all high — even though it’s pretty obvious. Coach really doesn’t think it’s a good idea, but Nick insists. They arrive to a party full of cops-to-be and Coach’s high hits him.
Cece starts talking to the dog and Coach hugs random people at the party. Nick gets paranoid and kicks over the grill to cause a distraction before running away. Now everyone wants to know what’s up with Winston’s friends.
To try to get Jess experience, Schmidt sets her up on 10 Dice dates. The first guy is some kind of criminal and Schmidt teaches her to make an excuse to get out. Number two is a creeper in too tight clothes. Number three is in the closet. Number four is just rude. Number five is violent. Number six has Velcro shoes.
Number seven is the dreamy guy she liked on the app. They hit it off until he mentions he lives across the street and she thinks he’s trying to just take her home. Then he gets upset at her for making assumptions.
After he leaves, Schmidt comes out to celebrate Jess’ success. But she doesn’t get it. Jess wants to fall in love and have a relationship. But Schmidt says the point of dating is to just keep on doing it and never stop.
Nick, Cece, and Coach hide away in someone’s closet. They begin talking about how Cece should go back to school and hum the graduation song. The cadets find them and freak them out. Winston tells them he knew they were high so he got his new buddies to scare them. He also gets a nickname: Toilet.
Jess meets up with the dreamy guy and apologizes to him. He accepts and they decide to start over again. But when he shows her a magic trick, Jess gets turned off. Still, she sits through his whole magic set, which even hurts us to watch.
Taking Jess’ advice, Schmidt calls back his date from the night before. He tells her they should hang out and get to know one another. But she says he doesn’t understand Dice and leaves.