See Colin Morgan’s teaser video for the first part of the Merlin series finale episode, “The Diamond of the Day.”

Although SyFy has chosen to delay the final five episodes of Merlin until May, Colin Morgan’s (Merlin) video recaps for each episode are still being released online.

In this video, the actor discusses the penultimate episode of the series, “The Diamond of the Day, Part 1,” and gets retrospective about the show as a whole:

“Entering into the finale episodes definitely felt like the end of an era,” Morgan says, “because when we first started, it was an adventure. It was a growing-up tale for the character and for me.”

He goes on to explain that this was his first proper, long-term television role. “It was a new adventure, it was new friends, it was new experiences… it was everything that I wanted to do as an actor,” he remembers. And now, five years later, he feels the same way.

By the fifth series, Merlin was, “still fulfilling what I wanted to do, it was still challenging me, it was still pushing me, it still felt exciting,” he says.

In the video, Morgan also addresses the shift that happened following the second series of the show, where it felt like they were entering into different territory. Because as the characters changed and became less innocent, so did the show.

Now, in series 5, “it feels like [Merlin] is becoming what he’s supposed to be,” Morgan says. But with so little time left, “will he achieve that? There’s a final twist to come, because his destiny is maybe not what he thought it was.”

Whatever the outcome of the series (which American audiences will not yet know, if they’ve managed to remain spoiler-free), however, Morgan thinks that, “there’s always hope in Merlin’s eyes, despite what fate may imply and what destiny is supposed to be, there’s always hope. And you can always change things if they mean so much to you, or if friends mean so much to you, or you’ve got so much, whatever, love in your heart… that you can overcome the impossible. And [Merlin] is put in a pretty impossible situation.”

Ultimately, Merlin has a dream about a kingdom he wants to live in, a future in which he can be whoever he wants to be – which is himself.

Will he achieve that dream? SyFy will show you on May 31 – or you could just pick up the Merlin season 5 box set, which goes on sale in the U.S. on April 9.