So you know all about the Quidditch World Cup, but nothing about the World Cup 2018. Don’t worry Harry Potter fans, we’ve got you covered.
It’s that time when when people’s cars become figures of expression, when every sports station is taken over by it, and it’s all the world is talking about right now. The World Cup is in full force, and it seems like everyone is into it except for you.
As a Harry Potter fan, you definitely have a passing interest in the sport. After all, Quidditch and soccer are incredibly similar, despite one being played in the air. If you want to join in on the water cooler talk, we’ve got you covered on popular talking points of the World Cup 2018, using Harry Potter references to make sure you understand.
Rise of the underdogs
The 2018 World Cup was making headlines before it even began. Big name teams who regularly participate in the World Cup didn’t qualify. Italy, Chile, Cameroon, USA, and the Netherlands are among the surprising qualifying upsets.
Imagine Hermione applying to be an Auror. She completes her seven years at Hogwarts, passes all her required N.E.W.T. exams, yet she doesn’t make it past the interview. She’s one of the best students to come out of Hogwarts, if not the best student. She should be able to get any job she wanted, but she ruins her chances by screwing up the first interview. It shouldn’t have happened, but it did.
The shocks didn’t stop there, though. Defending champions Germany didn’t make it past the group stage (the first stage). Two-time champions, Argentina, barely made it past the group stage and were swiftly eliminated in the round of 16, along with Portugal, and 2010 World Cup winners, Spain.
The elimination of top teams allowed underdog teams to advance. Panama and Iceland, two teams who have never made it to a World Cup before, both made it to the group stage this year. Then there’s teams like Croatia and Russia who made it to the round of 16 for the second and first time ever.
To put this in perspective, let’s take the four Hogwarts houses, during Harry’s years. Having a stacked team with players like Harry and Oliver Wood would make you think Gryffindor would sweep the tournament. Then the improbable happens. Gryffindor loses every match, Slytherin barely hangs on, Ravenclaw passably holds their own, and the unlikely Hufflepuffs narrowly beat everyone. This 2018 World Cup is like that: The rise of the badger.
The GOATs
No, we don’t mean Aberforth’s pets. The great, and most talked about players of the 2018 World Cup are Portugal’s Ronaldo, and Argentina’s Messi. The media constantly poses the question of who is the better player. Ask the most passive viewer of soccer and they’re sure to have an opinion one way or the other.
Although we said this was for Harry Potter fans, allow us a slight fandom extension. Comparing Messi and Ronaldo is like comparing Dumbledore and Gandalf. We love both of them, and they’re each incredibly talented wizards. Why would we pit them against each other? Can’t we just love both of them, without having to tear one of them down? No. The reality is, you’re going to have an opinion. It’s either Harry Potter or Lord of the Rings, you can’t love both equally.
While both Portugal and Argentina are out of the tournament now, but their legacy is so strong, the conversation surrounding them has continued. Ronaldo’s stats seem to prove he’s the ‘better’ player, many don’t care for his theatrics, and would argue that Messi was disadvantaged with a less supportive team in this World Cup.
When it comes to Messi and Argentina, the best equivalent is the end of The Sorcerer’s Stone. Harry is faced with multiple tasks to get through, none of which he could do entirely on his own. Ron and Hermione are essential for him getting through each challenge. Had Harry had the help of, say, people like Crabbe and Goyle, there’s no way he could have completed the tasks. Harry is an impressive 11 year old, but not quite capable of handling everything himself. Despite what some people might think, Messi is the same.
Newborn Babes
The youngest teams at this year’s World Cup are Nigeria, France, and England, with the average age of their players at 26 years old. Australia have the youngest player, Daniel Arzani at 19 years old, but it’s France’s Kylian Mbappe, the second youngest player of the tournament, who’s really making headlines. It’s easy to confuse Mbappe for a gazelle, particularly after France’s game against Argentina, in which he won Man of the Match.
It’s common for soccer players to start their careers early, given how short a career it is, but not so common for the teenagers to have such a global presence. The magnitude of Mbappe’s impact is comparable to Harry joining the Quidditch team at 11 years old. He’s so young, yet so talented, and he instantly makes a name for himself.
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Past prime
Argentina’s retired star player, Maradona is still making headlines, even almost 20 years after he played. The attention isn’t all good though. It’s awesome to see him attend Argentina’s games, but his behavior leaves something to be desired. His boisterousness and sometimes inappropriate actions have left many feeling like maybe he should have stayed at home and watched from the comfort of his own couch.
In his prime, Ludo Bagman was a star Beater, but as years wore on, he really let himself go. Bagman got heavily involved in gambling, going so far as to try and rig the Triwizard Tournament in his favor so he could pay off his debts. Whatever his celebrity past, he became an unsavoury character in his older years.
Dance like nobody’s watching
When a team scores, it’s always followed by some kind of celebratory gesture. At some point or another you’ve probably seen a player run down the pitch and slide on their knees. It’s not the most inventive thing to do, but it works. The Colombian team, however, is known for doing a little dance. Whether you support Colombia or not, you can’t deny their goal dance is super adorable.
Some Quidditch teams have the same idea. Although it’s now banned, back in the day when the Appleby Arrows’ would score, fans would shoot arrows from their wands in celebration. Fortunately for everyone involved, the Colombian celebration is far less dangerous, but you get the idea.
Dolphins on land
Brazilian star Neymar is known for his fancy footwork, but his name has also become synonymous with dramatic diving. He’s super talented but also super dramatic, with a tendency to overreact to challenges and play for fouls. It seems many players’ strategy is to take Neymar down, given that he’s the most fouled player of the World Cup. But his reaction to those fouls, the endless rolling around, has made him quite unpopular with soccer fans.
Similarly, Bellatrix Lestrange is unpopular with Harry Potter fans, has a flair for the dramatics, and is a talented witch. As Voldemort’s right hand she’d have to be talented. Voldemort wouldn’t have his most trusted ally be at all incapable. Bellatrix isn’t just skilled though, she’s theatrical. For Bellatrix, killing victims isn’t the only goal. She has a tendency to torture first, ‘play with her food’ if you will, before eventually putting an end to it. Like Neymar, there’s no doubt Bellatrix can get the job done, but you can count on her putting on a show first.