Glee catches disco fever this week, and we have a full recap of last night’s episode written by Glee Chat host Natalie Fisher.

The episode begins with the most unnecessary Blaine performance of all time. Hypable readers know how I feel about Darren Criss, he is my favorite human, I want him to be my BFF4EVA and Blaine is my woobie, but this number was so pointless. I’m not saying it wasn’t good. I could have done without the unrealistic disco ball following them around the school, but the on-stage part was cool and natural, and Darren really held his own while dancing with Heather Morris and Harry Shum Jr, Glee‘s two most talented dancers. It just gives me the uncomfortable shivers when I think about Glee‘s current need to feature a Blaine solo in every episode even when the plot does not involve him. Anyway, my major concern with that scene was actually that Brittany, Mike and Blaine were all in the same math class. Now, I could buy Brittany being in a junior class, or Blaine being smart enough to take a higher level of math with Mike, but I could not suspend my disbelief to accept that these three people would be on the same level academically. So we’re kind of off to a rough start. Oh yeah, the song is “You Should Be Dancing,” by the Bee Gees.

When asked what brought on the number, the always eager-to-please Blaine explains that the song was research for nationals, which will have the theme of “Vintage.” He says the combo of old and high-energy meant disco would be a perfect theme, and Mr. Schue heartily agrees, reminding the group that back when he was a student, they won nationals with a disco set. We’re then treated to a scene once seen before, back in the pilot, of Schue’s own glee club performing “That’s The Way (I Like It).” The snippet we see, featuring extreme costumes and unison singing, is probably the most realistic portrayal of show choir we’ve seen in the entire history of Glee. The rest of the club, who 30 seconds ago were enjoying Blaine’s number with delight, declare as one that disco sucks.

Now Mr. Schue is back in the choir room, talking to himself and playing with his glee club diorama, which has to be a direct dig at Community, except it will never be as funny as the way Community rags on Glee. His inner monologue lets us know that he’s worried about Finn, Santana and Mercedes, specifically, their lack of future plans. He mulls this over with the visibly pregnant Sue, and the conversation does some great meta references and throwbacks to both past incidents and the public reaction to them. Somehow, they conclude that the way to inspire the club is by making them perform music from the Saturday Night Fever album, with a prize for the winner. I don’t know, Glee logic.

While talking about Mercedes’ college options, she and Kurt are approached by a boy claiming to be their biggest fan – Wade Adams, the Glee Project‘s Alex Newell. He says he’s attended all of their performances, aside from boycotting West Side Story due to the pair not being cast as Tony and Maria, and Kurt, preening, introduces himself with delight. Wade is in Vocal Adrenaline – not sure how or why he’s at McKinley in the middle of a school day – but swears he’s no spy; he wants advice from his heroes. He explains that VA’s coach is Jesse St. James (yay!) who is a hard task-master, but that Jesse’s training is nothing compared to the way Wade is made to feel by other kids at school, and by his parents. He gets through life by fantasising about becoming his female alter-ego, Unique, and imagining how she would tackle things. We see a “flash-sideways” (© John Thrasher) of Unique, a Cee Lo, Ru Paul-esque figure fiercely approaching Kurt and Mercedes, and Kurt and Mercedes offer gentle support. Wade tells them that he wants to perform at VA’s regionals as Unique, and that’s why he’s come for advice, but the pair look uncertain.

In the choir room, the club stares in horror – well, in Blaine and Brittany’s case, hand-clasping delight – at the giant white dance floor that has been set up. Sue explains it’s her own replica of the light-up dance floor from the “legendary dancical” Saturday Night Fever (in real life, Glee used the actual same one from the movie). A flawless Rachel Berry line – “Coach Sylvester, while we applaud your proper use of the terminology, we told Mr. Schue, we do not support disco in this room” – explains the sentiments of most of New Directions, but Schue declares that, because “some of them” – the B-name giggle twins – do, that this week is Disco Week and that they’re starting with a dance-off for a shot at the grand prize: a replica of Travolta’s white disco suit. This, for some reason, actually inspires the group, and they participate in the dance-off as Schuester grooves with Sue and performs “Night Fever” at a pitch that should be made illegal for prime-time television. Aside from the bleeding from the ears, the absurdity of the floor just being there like that’s a normal thing to happen, and the fact Artie somehow managed to levitate his chair onto the 2-foot raised platform (“But it’s Glee, we’ll just say he sang himself up there or something”), the dance-off is actually one of Glee‘s more realistic and natural performances. It isn’t slick, it’s just some kids doing some fun and awkward unchoreographed dancing. Blaine – who’s wearing a normal outfit that suits his personality for once – was in on the disco plan the whole time, singing back-up with Joe. Rory, Sugar and Quinn are literally nowhere to be seen for this number or, in fact, the entire episode. Anyway, Sam is so hot that it makes me want to weep, and Finn is goofy in a really endearing way. The winners of the dance-off, who will progress to the next stage of suit competition, are Finn, Mercedes and Santana. Well. I can’t see where this is going at all. Will talks to the trio privately, where Finn – whom Schue planted drugs on in the pilot episode, please remember – is shocked that his teacher has ulterior motives. Schuester gives some really scary and inappropriate pressure about the three of them not having decided what they – 17 and 18-year-old kids – want to do with their lives, and assigns them the project of each singing a song from Saturday Night Fever and then sharing their hopes and dreams for the future with the class. Mercedes is angry that the dance-off was fixed and flat-out calls it a manipulative game, and I’m fonder of her than I have been in months, if not years. Actually, ever. Schuester ends this motivational session by saying “Guess what? Time’s running out,” to the teenagers. Okay.

In the next scene, Mercedes’ inner monologue is a rant at Schuester, a discussion of her ambitions and her lack of knowledge about how to achieve them. She then performs an enigmatic version of “Disco Inferno,” which is probably my favorite song she’s done and should definitely be blasted nightly at Heaven nightclub. I’m generally really pleased that we’re not getting a Glee tour this summer, because the kids need a rest, but I would kill to see this number live. The still-smitten Sam agrees with me, as he films Mercedes on his phone while he swoons, and Mercedes then tells the group about her hopes to become an inspirational soul singer and her uncertainty about the processes of being recognised by the industry. She shares fears that, though she’s the cream of the crop in that room, in the real world she may be skim milk. The idea seems to terrify everyone, but Sam looks tellingly at his recording and I certainly can’t see where this is going, either.

Rachel stares wistfully at Finn – they’re still not talking – and Kurt asks her to go and make up with Finn and help him. She claims that he called her out, so Finn should be the one to approach her, and Kurt snarks at her and walks off. Cut to Finn, who is approached by Puck in regards to the Los Angeles plans pitched in last week’s episode. Finn says he can’t do it, and the following conversation is kind of sweet, Puck being vulnerable and them talking about their past together. It’s one of the few moments of Glee where it really does feel like these characters grew up together in a small town and know each other inside and out. Puck, who has been a favorite of mine since the start, and who has shown perhaps the best character development in the series, then makes me cry by telling his best friend: “When you do find your dream, make it as big as you are, because you owe it to yourself – and now, you owe it to me.”

Sue calls out Kurt and Mercedes for giving tips to the enemy – a.k.a. Wade, a.k.a. Vocal Adrenaline. The pair explain the situation and we learn that they’d advised Wade against it. Sue chides them for this – she thinks they should have encouraged him – not out of altruism, but in attempt to see Vocal Adrenaline crash and burn, as Unique will not be accepted by the standards in Ohio. She asks them to give Wade a pair of special platforms to perform in at VA’s regionals.

Santana is performing her Saturday Night Fever number, “If I Can’t Have You,” in a peach halter-neck bell-bottom onesie and a headscarf, and she’s the most gorgeous creature put on the face of the planet. Oh wait, I was wrong earlier, there’s a brief Quinn appearance in the audience! I miss Santana wearing proper clothes – I hate the Cheerios outfit. R.I.P. hot jeans from Trouty Mouth. Anyway, Brittany is adoring, and Finn and Rachel use the opportunity to look poignant and unsettled about one another. Schue is impressed because he thinks Santana was singing the song about marriage equality and her new career goal to become a lawyer, and she looks at him like he was struck on the head as a child. Apparently she was singing the song about her desire for fame and willingness to get it at any cost, in any way. She’s 1000% sure she’ll make it. She’s also 1000% sure that silent piano guy keeps a petite Eurasian locked in a trunk under his bed. Um. Anyway, Brittany looks inspired.

Finn meets Rachel in the auditorium, where she’d passive-aggressively tweeted for anyone engaged to her to come there, because she wasn’t sure if she and Finn were actually talking. They make up in a very emotional scene which I can’t be bothered recapping properly, but basically Rachel is unselfish and they’re basically healthy and loving. She, without any guilt-tripping, offers to explore his dreams with him, even if it means not going to New York. I rarely care much about Finchel, despite liking them as individuals, but I cried in this scene and I really believed in their love. Yeah, yeah. Rachel charmingly asks to sing, and performs “How Deep Is Your Love,” which she had prepared in case he needed more convincing. The anonymous band dudes sing backup and I kind of love that. The song cuts over a scene of Finn and Rachel meeting with Emma and Will, and discussing college brochures and careers. The song ends, and Finn thanks everyone for their help and time, and he seems positive, but when he’s alone, the brochures go into the trash.

Random students are staring at Santana as she walks to class, and when she asks her friends as to why, Brittany declares with joy that Santana is famous now, due to a sex tape/Lord Tubbington video mash-up called “Two Girls, One Cat” that Brittany had seen fit to post online. We see some footage – just the cat parts, of course, which are hilarious, but… what? I’m sorry, what? Santana is utterly horrified and shocked that Brittany would think this was in any way a good idea, but Brittany claimed that Santana wanted to be famous, and now she is. Meanwhile, Finn’s been caught out by Schue, who apparently followed him out of the guidance meeting because he could tell Finn was faking his enthusiasm. They have a pretty on-the-same-level man-to-man talk (Schuester, get some adult friends. Where’s the Jeff Winger to your Professer Duncan?) about Finn not wanting to disappoint Rachel but feeling like he has no hope, no dreams and no talents (Darren Criss is apparently the only person involved with Glee to apply any logic and say that maybe Finn should consider becoming a professional drummer, seeing as he is very skilled at that). It’s a really great scene for Cory Monteith. Finn is desperate to find something that makes him feel young and alive, like being cheered at football or performing to an enthusiastic crowd, and Schuester ruins the moment, I mean, tries to inspire him by making him watch Saturday Night Fever. On VCR. Because this school can afford a rain machine but not a DVD player.

After receiving a seedy compliment from Brett, of “You smell homeless, Brett, homeless” fame, Santana talks to Brittany about taking the video down. Brittany refuses. More than that, she has a whole game plan on how to increase Santana’s fame via reality shows. Santana’s patience with Brittany absolutely astounds me, and I can only assume she really understands Britt on a deeper level, or is irrationally smitten for her to keep her cool with Brittany while clearly raging inside about the situation. Santana is clearly not into the idea of these reality shows, and it makes me fantasise that maybe Brittany is a secret genius pulling off some reverse psychology… but I doubt it.

Kurt and Mercedes visit the Vocal Adrenaline regionals to see Wade. It seems like they agreed to Coach Sue’s sabotage plan, but now regret it and try to talk Wade out of going on in drag. They’re again quite gentle and supportive, but Wade tells Kurt that Kurt doesn’t know what it’s like not to identify as a man, and that he’d hoped Kurt would understand. This is a very touchy subject which isn’t handled quite as smoothly as I’d like, as it is not, in my opinion, made too clear whether Wade is transgender and hoping to transition, or hoping to become involved in the drag scene, and the differences between those things. However, it isn’t the most insensitively that Glee has handled a subject. Their conversation is interrupted by VA’s new coach, Jesse St. James, played by the gorgeous Jonathan Groff. Jesse, clad in the most beautiful skinny-cut black suit I’ve ever seen, tries to usher them out, but they stay and watch side of stage. Vocal Adrenaline performs “Boogie Shoes” with Wade singing lead and appearing as Unique. The scene is one of the greatest Glee performances ever, with Jesse running out of his seat in the crowd, desperately beasting through the people backstage to call his errant lead singer off-stage – there’s genuine concern there, not just control-freak performance issues – but Unique brushes off her coach and kills the number. The crowd loves it, and Kurt and Mercedes join in the cheering and support. I love Vocal Adrenaline, and I am sure we’ll see Unique and Jesse at nationals.

Finn tells Rachel he’s decided what song he’s going to sing for the Saturday Night Fever challenge, but that he needs her for the performance, just like he needs her to make everything in his life worthwhile. The scene cuts to the performance of “More Than A Woman,” where Finchel, Klaine, Tike and Brittana all do some partnered dancing in 70s garb on the light-up floor. Finn’s falsetto is less offensive than Schuester’s, and it blends really well with Kurt’s backing vocals. I badly need a proper Kurt/Finn duet before they graduate. The dancing is sweet, and there’s a moment where Kurt dips Blaine, which most of fandom have taken to be a pretty telling indication of power dynamics in that relationship. The song ends, and it cuts back to the prior moment, where Rachel and Finn have clearly just rehearsed the number. She loves it, and Finn tells her that he’s also figured out what he wants to do after school. He’s decided – because of Saturday Night Fever – that he wants to move to New York and take on the world, and try to get into acting and attend James Lipton’s Actors Studio. They make sure to spell this out very clearly, mentioning the network, because the cast of Glee recently appeared on Inside the Actors Studio. I have never got the impression that Finn was interested in acting in any way, but apparently he’s always been too scared to admit it. Rachel is excited and says it’s a perfect fit for him, but genuinely hopes he isn’t doing it for her sake. They say some more emotional things that don’t come across over-dramatically, which make me really think that Finchel will actually be endgame now that they’ve figured out how to be healthy and move forward together. Good. Better them than Klaine.

Mercedes and Kurt are discussing Unique’s success when they’re awkwardly interrupted by my TV boyfriend, Sam Evans. Mercedes is taken aback – she’s been avoiding him, and he acknowledges that but says he needs to show her something. He has – oh my god, I’m so shocked – posted the video of her “Disco Inferno” on YouTube, where is has 485 views… or possibly comments…they seem to mix that up. Mercedes is more actively upset that Sam posted the video without asking than Santana is about the sex tape, at least to Brittany’s face, which is just a measure of how whipped Santana is by Brittany. Anyway, Mercedes is inspired by the positive reaction from strangers, and Sam says some awesome and supportive things, before kissing her.

Sue has Brittany and Santana in her office, where Britt doesn’t cop any slack for the sex tape, but Santana gets a telling-off for her ruthless fame hunger. Okay, no. But as it goes on, we learn that Santana regrets her attitude and no longer feels like she would do anything for fame, if it is without substance. It turns out Brittany and Sue got together to apply for a cheerleading scholarship for Santana – a full ride from the University of Louisville. Sue acknowledges that her captain won’t be a cheerleader forever, but sees it as a good opportunity to get her foot in the door and figure out what she might like to study. All-in-all, despite Sue’s still-present cracks about Santana’s season 1 boob job, she handles Santana much, much better than Schue handled Finn. Santana’s uncertain about whether this is the answer for her, but that’s a good start – a very reasonable and realistic take on what post-high school plans should be like, as opposed to Schue’s FIGURE OUT YOUR STUFF, YOUR LIFE IS OVER attitude at the beginning of the episode. Santana thanks Brittany for her support and the two make up.

In her one token line of exposition allocated to her per episode, Tina opens up the last scene by asking who won the John Travolta suit. Schue and Sue reveal the winners – “If there’s one thing I like more than punishing you idiots, it’s rewarding you for being slightly less lazy and idiotic,” says Sue. I really love this friendly-bitchy ally Sue. It’s all three of their troubled finalists, who each wear the thing pretty well. The episode ends with these three leading the club in a performance of “Stayin’ Alive,” and to paraphrase Oprah, everybody gets a suit!

And that’s what you missed on Glee!