The children of the 00s might not believe it today, but before Tim Burton only made mediocre remmakes of classic children’s films, he made films that were actually scary, and pretty good!

After the financial battleship that was ‘Alice in Wonderland’, Burton was given permission to take a huge budget and make his dream project, Inception-style. Surprisingly, Burton’s ‘dream project’ was even weirder than Christopher Nolan’s: a comic reboot of a 1960s gothic soap opera that neither I nor anyone I know had heard of prior to the announcement of this film.

‘Dark Shadows’ is about as close a Burton film to his classics ‘Edward Scissorhands’ and Beetlejuice’ as his fans should dare to dream about at this stage in his career.

The 10-minute prologue to ‘Dark Shadows’ is visually stunning and genuinely interesting, which is more than can be said for most of the film. When we first arrive at the Collinswood mansion, it feels like something out of ‘Edward Scissorhands’, ‘Batman’ or one of Burton’s other classics. As the characters continue to appear, the narrative becomes more confused, and some plot threads are opened that are never closed. Helena Bonham Carter’s character is a waste of time, in my opinion, and only an excuse for Burton to include his wife in the film.

‘Dark Shadows’ fails to be scary, or even atmospheric, due to the amount of jokes in the script, although some of them are quite funny. The film certainly passes the laugh test for a comedy, but Burton clearly wants it to be more than a comedy. He wants it to be everything. The last half-hour of the film is a mess- the cheesiness is upped by 500% and the special effects take a turn for the ridiculous.

Johnny Depp is engaging as always as the film’s protagonist, Barnabas, but Chloe Moretz and Michelle Pfeiffer’s characters are so unoriginal that they make every scene more dull.
Tim Burton superfans should see the film, purely for the beginning and for Depp’s performance, and fans of 70s references and fish-out-of-water stories will also be entertained. For everyone else, stay in your dark shadows until ‘Frankenweenie’ is released later this year.