I feel we are in for a spectacular season of DwtS! Tonight’s show was perhaps the best Week 2 ever – I laughed, cried, and cheered, all in rapid succession.

There are so many promising couples, the pros all seem to be having their best season in years, and the right couple went home.

First things first, congratulations to DwtS’ golden boy, Derek Hough, on his Emmy win yesterday! He won the Emmy for Outstanding Choreography. In other Hough-related good news, Derek’s sister and two-time champion Julianne has been announced as a guest judge later on this season. She is going to be fabulous; I’ve missed Julianne’s energy in the ballroom!

Tonight, things began with a large group number, which was quite good until they started haphazardly introducing couples halfway through. I disapprove; the couples should be paraded out with close-ups of them waving (and leaving us to wonder about their costumes), not given quick shout-outs in threes.

The night ended with the hurried elimination of… Keyshawn Johnson and Sharna Burgess! Oh, happy days are these! I said last week I can’t stand Keyshawn, and he didn’t endear himself this week either. Good-bye, and good riddance. Poor Sharna, though – after making the most of Andy Dick last season, she was the only new pro to return, only to be eliminated in last place. Here’s hoping she returns next time with a decent partner.

Now, in order of tonight’s scores, let’s welcome our stars!

First Place, 26 points: Corbin and Karina (Jive). Okay, I’ll fess up – I LOVE High School Musical! One of my old email addresses was “hsmfanatic,” I have all the songs and some dances memorized… you get the idea. So everything about Corbin’s segment this week made me positively squee! He wanted to do a tribute to his High School Musical days, so he dressed in his baseball uniform from High School Musical 2. I was expecting a routine to “I Don’t Dance” – while a One Direction song is well and good, I expect a proper High School Musical tribute later on! But Corbin gets total brownie points for including the signature High School Musical-poster jump in his routine. Better yet, he was being cheered on by my favorite among the cast, Lucas Grabeel, and a man I believe is High School Musical choreographer Chucky Klapow. After his dance, Corbin took a moment to have the whole crowd partake in the High School Musical cheer: “What team?!” “Wildcats!” I was beside myself.

As for the dancing – it was good. I agreed with Len (whose critiques were spot-on tonight) – “It wasn’t a home run, but you got to third base.” The dance was impressive, in that Corbin went all out trying to do everything Karina could think of, and doing it in time to very fast music. But his feet weren’t particularly sharp, and a lot of the time he wouldn’t really finish a movement before launching into the next one. (Two-week total: 50 points, second place)

Second Place (tie), 25 points: Elizabeth and Val (Samba). Elizabeth and Val kicked off the night on a high note – this was one of the most impressive sambas I’ve seen at this early stage in the competition. Elizabeth was excellent all around, from her footwork to the hips, and she even achieved that samba bounce that celebrities find so elusive. Her stationary samba walks were impeccable. Val put a lot of content into the routine, with enough shimmying to keep it sexy without overdoing it. They even performed well despite some weird music that never really took off. The nine from Len, while surprisingly generous, was well-deserved. (Two-week total: 49 points, third place)

Second Place (tie), 25 points: Christina and Mark (Paso Doble). Mark Ballas and Lady Gaga seem like a match made in heaven, so the couple was in fine form dancing to “Applause,” in one of the best routines Mark’s ever choreographed. It was still paso doble, but with enough of a crazy flair to make it unique. I’m almost willing to forgive Mark for the image of his rolled up shorts… almost. Christina did well for a Week 2 paso, with great lines, even though I felt she could have used more power in her movement. (Two-week total: 47 points, fourth place)

Third Place (tie), 24 points: Amber and Derek (Jive). Considering how high the bar was set last week, this jive did not match expectations. Amber’s energy was great – she lights up when dancing – but her footwork was bad (as the judges said). Solid effort, but not great. Far better was the rehearsal package, when Amber talked about the very real problem of jiving with big boobs. This is actually an issue I’ve encountered at dance practice – when girls with large chests can’t contain those chests, the boobs bounce enough to knock someone out. The best part was Derek’s imitation of getting knocked out by Amber’s breasts – as Tom said, he deserves another award for that! (Two-week total: 51 points, first place)

Third Place (tie), 24 points: Jack and Cheryl (Rhumba). I absolutely love Jack! Jack has a great self-deprecating sense of humor, but when he dances, it’s spell-binding I almost didn’t notice his weird hands and funky footwork amid the performance – and his quality of movement, the fluidity of it, is impressive. Cheryl is on fire this season – looking great, making great choreography, and being encouraging towards her partner. Could this be the season she finally reclaims the Mirrorball after seven years? Jack also had one of the best rehearsal packages ever. Cheryl was teaching him to be sensual for the rhumba, and just as he comments, “I feel like we’re making a porno,” his mom shows up! Mom then stayed to help as Jack tried to be sensual… which, as Tom said, seems a strange time to call in one’s mother for help. (Two-week total: 47 points, fourth place)

Third Place (tie), 24 points: Leah and Tony (Samba). Leah performed a good samba, high energy with good lines. The only problem is that her movements weren’t sharp enough, but the judges overlooked that and said it was “great.” But Leah herself might be overlooked – to me, she is the least memorable contestant. To remedy that, she found herself a storyline: she is breaking away from the Church of Scientology, and if she fails at DwtS, it’ll prove the Scientologists right. Well, okay then, go Leah! And is it just me, or does Tony by this point have a degree in psychiatry from Mirrorball University? Seems like every season for eight years he’s comforted emotionally distraught partners, over everything from their weight to evil paparazzi to ex-husbands. (Two-week total: 45 points, fifth place)

Fourth Place, 23 points: Brant and Peta (Rhumba). These two ooze so much sexual chemistry, it’s ridiculous. Brant’s an actor, so this is what he’s good at. Peta’s taking full advantage of this, wisely instructing him to “look into Carrie Ann’s soul as I undress you.” But for all of Peta’s great strategy, her choreography is still sorely lacking. Most of this dance consisted of Brant grabbing Peta sensually, and then holding her as she posed with her legs at impossible angles. Len called them out on it, but everyone else was too distracted by the sensuality. Certainly the girls from “Pretty Little Liars” – Ashley Benson, Shay Mitchell, and Sasha Pieterse – were cheering with gusto. But I agree with Bruno’s critique: how is it that, while dancing a rhumba to “Undress You” on DwtS, Brant still had his shirt on at the end? Did he miss the memo that this is Dancing with the Stars? I expect better of him in the future! (Two-week total: 45 points, fifth place)

Fifth Place, 21 points: Bill and Emma (Jive). I don’t know why Bill got an A for effort this week, because this jive was nothing short of atrocious. Everything about it, from the terrible footwork to the lack of posture and everything in between, was really bad. In fact, it was far worse than last week’s dance, and certainly didn’t deserve to be this high up the leader board; I expected fives, not sevens. The running gag of this number was that Emma was trying to steal Derek’s choreography – which I’m sure a few of the pros have done, though none admit it so baldly. At least it’s now acknowledged that Derek is the best! My money is on them to head home next week. (Two-week total: 39 points, eighth place)

Sixth Place, 20 points: Snooki and Sasha (Rhumba). I thought this dance was decent. Len’s critique was spot on – it was very pretty to look at, but there was not enough fluid movement, more of just moving from pose to pose But what pretty poses they were! Carrie Ann got her knickers in a twist over lifts, docking them a point. Snooki is also getting grating with her attitude of “Ohmigod, I’ll get pregnant if Sasha touches my hips!” After Jersey Shore, surely she’s past the idea of boys having cooties? (Two-week total: 43 points, sixth place)

Seventh Place, 19 points: Valerie and Tristan (Paso Doble). Oh, who gives a damn how the dance went?! Valerie is just one of the most beautiful people ever. When her knee started acting up, Tristan warned her against pushing it, because it’ll make things worse later. Her response? “I’m 74 with terminal cancer. Just give me horse tranquilizer or whatever to make me go!” Can’t argue with that. Then, the rehearsal package cut to Tristan watching Valerie dance, and he got choked up and started wiping away tears, managing to choke out, “You are an amazing person, Valerie Harper.” And I just LOST IT, and started crying myself. This was one of the most powerful, most beautiful moments ever on DwtS. We regularly see the celebrities crying, with the pro comforting them. Occasionally, the pros will cry after a really emotional routine. But to see a pro tear up like that during rehearsal is, to my recollection, unprecedented – even Tom remarked on it.

If we must talk about the dancing, the beginning was quite good, it derailed in the middle, and kind of came back together in the end. Even as the routine derailed, Valerie kept relentlessly giving it her all. The scores were lower than I expected, particularly given the generosity of the other scores… but let’s be real, her scores don’t matter in the slightest right now. (Two-week total: 40 points, seventh place)

Eighth Place, 18 points: Keyshawn and Sharna (Samba). Thank heavens they headed home, because Keyshawn would not shut up! In the middle of Bruno’s critique, Keyshawn interrupted him Kanye-style to rhapsodize about the incredible journey he’s been on for all of three weeks. There is a time and place for such speeches (for example, at the end of the show when one is eliminated), but mid-critique is not that time, and he kept going on and on. We are two weeks in, and I can’t even remember everyone’s name – it is too early for I’ve-come-so-far stories. As for the dancing, best not to think of it – no musicality, some bizarre wiggling but no suggestion of samba, no bounce… the sixes seemed too generous to me, but at least he’s gone now! (Two-week total: 35 points, ninth place)

Last Place, 17 points: Bill and Tyne (Paso Doble). I hadn’t realized how big a following Bill Nye has, but it looks like he’ll stick around for a few weeks yet. Which may be a good thing, since it looks like we’ll be getting more crazy Andy Dick-style routines from him. For his paso, Bill was a crazy pianist, with an Einstein-like wig and everything. The technique was appalling, but the performance was entertaining! (Two-week total: 31 points, last place)

Are you liking this season as much as I am? Any early favorites? Any predictions for next week? Write them in the comments!