Elizabeth Henstridge reflects on season 5’s harrowing conclusion for FitzSimmons, and what’s coming next on Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. season 6.

When Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. season 6 premieres this Friday, the fallout from the season 5 finale will loom heavily over the surviving team. On Earth, Mack, May, and Elena grapple with Coulson’s death; out in space, Simmons and Daisy deal with the ever-present consequences of Fitz’s passing, searching for his lost-in-time double.

If fans are still reeling from these losses, they are in good company with Elizabeth Henstridge. Like her character Jemma Simmons, the actress remains moved by the emotional effort of the season 5 finale.

“I mean, I’m a loser in a way,” Henstridge says ruefully. “I took it really hard. Really hard. Because we thought that was it [for the show.] So then I go, wow. You’re ending it, that’s it. Wow, that’s too much for me.”

Compounding the intensity was Simmons’ absence from Fitz (Iain DeCaestacker)’s death scene. Henstridge decided not to come to set for filming (“I can’t,” she remembers thinking) but the impact reverberated.

“The next day on set, it was like somebody had actually died,” she recalls.

“It was so somber and everybody was talking about it, and talking to me about how [Iain] just broke everybody’s heart in that moment. And you watch it, and you’re like…” Henstridge shakes her head.

“Yeah,” she concludes. “I was devastated.”

Of course, not being involved in Fitz’s death didn’t spare Henstridge from emotional scenes. Simmons’ extended, wordless reaction to the news is brief, but intensely powerful.

“There are different takes of that, but we maybe only did it three times,” she says. “It goes longer, but there was never any more words. It was just… it was actually really nice how they cut it, because you just see the realization and then we’re out. But that scene was always just that moment.”

All told, filming the Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. season 5 finale — not accidentally titled “The End” — was an emotional rollercoaster for Henstridge and the entire cast and crew.

“I feel so abnormal that I [feel so emotional about it,] but… we’ve kept most of our crew for the whole time, so it was just so heavy filming the whole episode,” Henstridge says. “Everybody was around, everything was just so weighted and everything was the last time you were going to be doing it. There’s so many outtakes where it’s like, we all had to just take a breath, almost do a group hug, and then get back on it again.”

“Because this show has changed every person’s life on it. You sign those contracts and you’re like, this is gonna last a few seasons, or the first season probably won’t get [renewed.] Every year, it’s just been the little train that could, and we just keep going.”

Of course, Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D.‘s unexpected renewal for season 6 and 7 means that those final moments will not be the end. The team will charge forward into further adventures, missing Coulson and searching for Fitz.

So what’s ahead for Simmons in this brave new world? Henstridge can’t share much before the Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. season 6 premiere, but she does anticipate darkness — and its consequences — upcoming.

Simmons has “one goal,” she says, and “[doesn’t] really care what it takes to get to that. Which is really fun to play, because [this version of Jemma] is the best. I wish I could be her more!”

The Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. season 6 premiere, “Missing Pieces,” airs Friday, May 10 at 9:00 p.m. on ABC.