The best TV quotes of the week are highlighted every Saturday on Hypable. If you want to know what was funny, sad, or snarky on TV this week, look no further.
Did your favorite show bring on the funny, the memorable, or the meta this week with quotable TV quotes? Did you laugh out loud from the words of the resident “joke machine”? Will you be making a meme from what your favorite characters said? Are their words destined to end up on a t-shirt or coffee mug?
So, check it out, and see if our picks for favorite TV quotes of the week match your favorite TV quotes of the week. We want to include your fandom. If we missed something, you can make sure your favorite TV quotes of the week are featured next week by giving a suggestion to the writer who usually covers your fandom in the recap discussion of the latest episode.
‘Glee’
Spencer: “Can you stop being such a whiny homo and get back in there?”
Rachel: “Um, excuse me, I haven’t been out of this school for that long but when I was here we worked really hard to make sure bullies like you don’t use words like that.”
Sam: “Rachel, no, it’s cool, Spencer’s totally gay.”
Spencer: “I’m kind of a post-modern gay teen. You see, positive representations of gays in the mass media has given me the confidence I need to be myself, which, turns out, is kind of an arrogant jerk. Oh, and your show sucked.”
Glee gets satirical about its own legacy when, upon her return to Lima, Rachel meets new-generation McKinley student Spencer, a gay football player who’s living a very different high school experience compared to out-of-the-closet teens five years ago.
‘Agent Carter’
Jarvis: “Miss Carter?”
Peggy Carter: “Do you know anyone else handling high explosives at this time of night?”
Jarvis: “Well, as a matter of fact, no. It’s just, I promised my wife a soufflé, and if I don’t get it in the oven by-.”
Peggy Carter: “Mr. Jarvis, what was once a theory is now a bomb. So apologies to your wife, but dinner will have to wait!”
When Agent Peggy Carter finds herself in a spot of bother (i.e., holding Howard Stark’s weaponized nitramene in a nightclub) she calls Jarvis for help which is inconveniently during his dinner time with his wife.
‘American Horror Story’
Bette and Dot Tattler: “We have no need for secrets.”
Bette and Dot Tattler finally break through their years of distrust and anger, and decide to move forward working together. They toss their diaries in a fire, a symbolic gesture to rid themselves of privacy, and acceptance that every decision they make affects both of them.
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On page 2: ‘Elementary,’ ‘Galavant,’ and ‘Big Bang Theory’
‘Elementary’
Sherlock: “They want me to compose a treatise on why the character of Bella should’ve ended up with Jacob rather than Edward.”
Sherlock’s involvement with the Internet collective, Everyone, has lead him to complete some humiliating tasks in exchange for information. Previously, he has been known to stand outside asking to be punched in the arm, and to record a performance from Frozen in a prom dress. For this week’s task, Sherlock must read his treatise in the lobby of a fan convention. In his research, he does not see a reason why the three lovers could not achieve some sort of mutually beneficial arrangement.
‘Big Bang Theory’
Sheldon: “I’m not upset. I’m just imagining a world without my best friend in it! I want you to know that I’m aware of how difficult I can be. So I just want to say thank you for putting up with me.”
Leonard and Sheldon come to grips with their relationship as friends and roommates as they have to face the ramifications of Leonard potentially moving out. In the end, after weaving baskets and helmets, Penny and Leonard go to bed to in Penny’s apartment… with Sheldon sleeping in her living room.
‘Galavant’
Galavant: “You know what, Jean? It’s 1256. The ‘your momma’ jokes, they’re getting really old.”
Jean Hamm: “So is your momma.”
In case anyone thought Galavant was going to have a serious side, the answer is no. It’s going to be a season of slapstick, and at times groan-worthy, and heard-it-before jokes, but we mean that in the best way possible.