Game of Thrones season 4 airs tomorrow night, and having not read the books, this writer has no idea what’s going to happen – so I decided to try and predict what will happen in the next 10 episodes.
Every non-book reader knows this feeling: Being all excited about a new episode/season of Game of Thrones when suddenly, out of nowhere, a wild Song of Ice and Fire fan appears from your bushes and starts raining on your parade.
“I can’t believe you haven’t read them,” they’ll tell you. “I know exactly what season 4 is going to have, and you’re gunna FREAK OUT.” Really? Game of Thrones is going to have a shocking episode? That’s so hard to believe.
With so many people telling me just how insane this season is going to be, my mind went a little crazy and I decided to write down all of my ideas.
Beware of spoilers from seasons 1-3!
Another Stark dies
It’s pretty obvious which family drew the short straw in this show. So far season 1 and season 3 have had members of the Stark family die, and since Sansa is living in the closest proximity to Joffrey Baratheon it makes sense that her head will be next on the chopping block. The Stark family motto really should’ve been “Death is coming.”
Joffrey dies
Okay, this isn’t so much a prediction but a hope. He is the biggest, most horrible, ugliest douchebag that has ever defiled our televisions. If he doesn’t die soon, we’re going to be immensely angry. And we hope that when it does happen, it’s the equivalent of the golden crown Viserys got in the first season.
Dragons go wild
Okay, so before we explain the prediction we have to say that the first thing that came to our minds when writing that title was dragons in speedos and bikinis that burn up on spring break. You’re welcome for that mental image.
It’s clear from the trailers that the dragons are getting too big for even Daenerys to control, so we imagine that if she can’t control them they will go wild by the end of the season and wreak havoc upon the world.
Jaime and his sister have sex again
Man, those two have been separated way too long and we can just tell that there’s some pent up incest in there waiting to get out. While we definitely ship Jaime with Brienne of Tarth, and we hope that Jaime’s mind has been cleansed at least a little bit, we definitely see another gross sex scene in the works – hopefully without the defenestration this time.
White Walkers get a major arc
We’re immensely disappointed in the lack of White Walkers in the last season, and so we imagine that to make up for that they’re going to be a huge part in Jon Snow’s part in the show. The last we saw the White Walkers they were gathering an army towards The Wall, and if winter really is coming then everyone is just f*cked.
How did I do?
Do you agree with some of my predictions, or am I just crazy? Let us know in the comments below! And if you have read the books, please keep spoilers out of the discussion.