This Friday, the Jason Segel and Cameron Diaz movie Sex Tape will hit theaters.
Sex Tape centers around the premise of Segel and Diaz’s characters making a sex tape which, before they can delete it off of their iPad, gets uploaded on to cloud for all of their friends and family to see. As Segel’s character says in the trailer, “Nobody understands the cloud.”
As it turns out, Apple themselves unsurprisingly do understand the cloud. GQ decided to test them on their knowledge and to find out if the premise of Sex Tape was at all plausible. Here’s what they found out:
How’s it going today, Lauren?
Pretty bad. I have a burning question about the Cloud.
Absolutely. Go ahead.
So you know how you can film videos on your iPad?
Yes ma’am.
So I filmed a video I don’t want anyone to see ever. Like, you know the kind of video I’m talking about?
[Laughs] Okay.
I’m talking about a sex video, Dave.
Oh, I see.
Can that go up into the Cloud without me knowing it?
I really don’t think iCloud gets videos uploaded, but I want to just make sure, because your privacy is certainly important, and what you do is your personal business, and I think it should be your business unless you make it somebody else’s.
Exactly. Thank you for thinking that about my sex video.
So I’d be more than happy to make sure that your private videos are kept safe and, just that: private.
Great.
After some double checking, Apple came back with an answer.
All right, so I went ahead and looked into it for you, and you would have to make special settings for anyone to be able to see that—like a shared stream.
So videos can’t just go into the Cloud?
Videos can be backed up to iCloud, but what that means is the video would be saved as, like, a backup. But you wouldn’t be able to share it with anyone. No one can go into the iCloud and watch the video.
Okay. So let’s say I made my sex video, and somehow it got into the Cloud, and then I gave iPads as gifts to a hundred of my friends and family. What are the chances they would ever get that sex video on their iPads?
Impossible. They can’t connect to your iPad over, like, a network and just get info. You would be the one who has control.
So that’s a confirmation from Apple. The premise of Sex Tape is completely ludicrous.
But really, who’s surprised? Sex Tape is a movie, and a comedy no less, and the idea of a sex tape getting uploaded and seen by friends and family is exactly the kind of premise we’d expect from a modern comedy. It remains to be seen if it will make for quality laughs, but it’s a solid premise that works regardless of it’s plausibility.
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