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The Vampire Diaries season 5, episode 8 “Dead Man on Campus” just aired. Check out our sassy recap of the episode along with a preview for the next episode, “The Cell,” which airs in December.

This recap is divided by commercial breaks and was written by Tariq Kyle during his viewing of tonight’s episode of The Vampire Diaries, season 5, episode 8 “Dead Man on Campus.” Let us know what you think of the sassycap in the comments below!

Bonnie’s Back, Bitches!
-Professor Maxfield is conducting experiments on Jesse…creeper. He says it took Jesse 14 days to turn from human to vampire: Wat.
-Bonnie has a haircut! She looks fab, and we’re so happy for her new college life! She’s so adorableeee.
-She’s phoning her mom and mentions all the new college things. Seriously, what dorm DOES have a fireplace?! #royals
-Wait, so Bonnie isn’t a witch anymore because she’s the anchor? Wat. Noooo!
-Registering for classes is code for making out with Jeremy. …where can we register for classes?
-A woman wants to pass to the other side, touches Bonnie and disappears. That looked way too painful!
-Stefan is having difficulties coping with the whole drowned and dying a thousand times thing.
-Katherine talks with Matt about the guy who “activated” Matt. She’s hiding something.
-Jesse calls Caroline for help, and his roommate (Aaron) comes home and he attacks him. AHHH. NOT AARON :(

B-O-Y-F-R-I-E-N-D
-Jesse explains to Caroline what he’s been through. Professor Maxfield has been injecting him with some weird blood. …interesting.
-He didn’t kill the professor! Just trapped him. Well done, newb Vampire. Well done.
-Jesse heals Aaron with Caroline’s help, but…Aaron looked a little too eager to drink that stuff.
-Katherine talks to Stefan, telling him he’ll end up with someone who looks like her. Foreshadowing?
-Katherine can help Stefan out if he does her a favor. She also called Nadia back and introduces her to him. Will the family get back together at last?!
-Bonnie explains she’s looking for “my..um…I’m not sure what he is actually.” GIRL. BOYFRIEND. Say it out loud. B-o-y-f-r-i-e-n-d. If that doesn’t happen, then Julie Plec is a cruel, cruel human.
-Damon is interrogating Professor Maxfield and will inject a flesh-eating bacteria into him if he doesn’t answer truthfully. Professor just can’t get a break!

The Hunger Games: TVD Edition
-Katherine, Nadia, and Stefan all go to Matt to talk to his “passenger.”
-Katherine is suspicious of anyone dating her daughter, ahah.
-After Silas was dead, the passenger guy wanted to kill Katherine. Katherine is having NONE of it. NONE.
-Therefore, Katherine stabs Matt with the mystery knife. It’s apparently the only thing that can kill a passenger.
-Damon is really enjoying torturing Professor Maxfield. We can’t tell if that’s sexy or psychotic. We’ll go with sexy.
-Bonnie has a conversation with the woman who passed through her earlier. Such a nice witch! Aww. Maybe being the anchor isn’t all bad.
-Jeremy takes Bonnie to “register for classes.” No, seriously, where can we sign up?!
-Professor Maxfield was aiming to turn Jesse into a different vampire. He claims vampires are dangerous because humans are their food source, and he wants to change that.
-Jesse really craves VAMPIRE BLOOD!?
-In the theme of this weekend, this episode just became: The Hunger Games: Vampire Diaries Edition.

Everyone’s Drunk ALL the Time
-Aaron and Elena bond over dead parents. Adorable…and dark. We don’t mind the dark.
-Aaron explains that his parents were attacked while camping and his parents had bite marks on their neck. Vampire?! Vampire. Definitely vampire.
-Meanwhile, Stefan is at a bar drinking. Why does everyone always drink in this show?! Makes us jealous.
-Stefan has more panic attacks about drowning while Katherine finds him in an alley, and she’s all supportive. Aww.
-Admit it, you like the Katherine and Stefan scenes.
-Stefan almost kills Katherine but she tells him to name all the people he’s killed. …creepy, but effective.
-Jesse finds Professor Maxfield and attacks Damon. Damon’s all Damon-y and explains that because he’s older he’s stronger than Jesse.
-Professor Maxfield has also changed THAT.

An Old Ship Has Emerged!
-While Jesse is attacking Damon, Elena stakes him. Caroline is all “Noooo!”
-Here’s hoping Professor Maxfield didn’t change the whole wood being his kryptonite thing too…
-Stefan finds a note to Nadia written by Katherine. …a suicide note!?
-Katherine is on top of the clock tower in the middle of Mystic Falls. She’s about to jump. This is a whole new level of low.
-Katherine jumps: NOOO! DON’T!
-Stefan saves her. YES! C’mon, people, you don’t really like these Stetherine scenes?! …Kathefan? …Statherine?
-Katherine explains that she’s dying of old age and it’s being sped up by the cure. We’re tearing up over here.
-Stefan explains “You’re Katherine Pierce. Suck it up.” YES. Motivate her, man!

What the HELL is an “Augustine”?
-Bonnie misses magic while she’s lighting a candle. Her “class registration” candles. ;)
-Those class registration forms look pretty complicated. Bonnie, do you need help there?
-Jesse passed through to the other side and Bonnie got all the pain that came with it. In front of Jeremy. Class registration has halted.
-Oh, nope it hasn’t. Class registration will continue as planned, despite interruptions from ghosts.
-Elena and Caroline have a small fight. The person she stopped is apparently as dangerous as the person Elena is inviting into her bedroom. The Delena shippers need aloe for that burn.
-Damon is apparently an Augustine Vampire?! #21051?!
-Apparently the Augustine is hella old and has been operating for decades.
-Damon tries to kill Professor Maxfield but he deploys an aerosol version of vervain.
-Augustine apparently has Damon BACK?! When did they have him!?
-Damon is trapped in a cell. Our poor baby! :(

What did you think of tonight’s episode of ‘The Vampire Diaries’

The next episode doesn’t air until December 5, but check out the promo below!

  • Christina

    Seriously loving all the sass Kyle! So i’m super pissed that not only Kathrine mentioned ‘destiny’ to Stefan again, but Caroline is putting some serious anti-Damon thoughts in Elena’s head. we’ve had Delena for like a couple episodes c’mon! :( Now that Bonnie’s not a witch anymore there’s no scapegoat! guess Kathrine has to find a cure on her own (no pun intended)

  • http://ravenclaw1991.tumblr.com/ ravenclaw1991

    Jeremy should take his shirt off more often! I’m a little scared for Damon now. And poor Jesse, I’m glad Caroline didn’t really get THAT mad at Elene for killing him. I freaking had Dr. Maxfield. At least Matt is back to normal . I feel really bad for Bonnie though, but I agree! Her haircut looks really nice. Also glad that Stefan managed to catch Katherine before she hit the ground.

    • quitracpenlo1984

      visit GATVERcom if you would like to watch the replay of this episode for free

  • Elspeth

    What I was surprised about was the fact that Katherine’s father was a traveler which is how she knew to get rid of one. Did that make her a witch before?

    • Angel

      Just because her father was a traveler, it does not mean she was given the gift of being a witch. She’s Amara’s doppelganger, so I doubt she was a witch, Amara was a regular, human mortal. So I’m sure Katherine was one, if Katherine was a witch, she wouldn’t need to become a vampire, she’d protect herself from Klaus or even resurrect herself, and heal herself, and do many things. Unless her powers never came in until she hit the age of 17 – 18 because she became a vampire at that time.

      I doubt that Katherine was a traveler or a witch, if so, her whole family would be witches, including her siblings. I seriously doubt it as she’s Amara’s doppelganger, but a Silas doppelganger, than yes, there is a possibility.

  • Leila

    I’m absolutely loving the Katherine/Stefan stuff! I’ve been hoping they end up together since season 2, and now perhaps those hopes might come true! I would be really pleased if the endgame for couples on this show was Katherine/Stefan and Delena. I like Bonnie and Jeremy, but I must admit I still miss Anna.

    • Sam

      I miss Anna too. such a sweet little thing, truly in love.

  • sandra

    Looking forward to Damon finally being tortured and in pain. I mean, finally. Oh, hate the idea of Stefan and Katherine. But, most of all i hate the new Elena. Hypocrite Slut.

    • ka,

      your seriously messed up. Damons been tortured and in pain many times.dumb idiot

    • I’llBeYourAngel

      Sad how you hate such a perfect couple. Stefan has nobody right now, besides Caroline and Katherine, Katherine brings out the real side of Stefan, a fun, gentle, real side of him, she has proved she is an impact in his life as she was the one who got him the feel, and Elena couldn’t even Lexi couldn’t but it was Katherine who did, it was also Katherine who was the real reason why Stefan saved Damon and Klaus, he had his humanity off and he still listened to her, because of that he got his humanity back. All because of Katherine, he didn’t listen to anybody, besides Katherine.

      Elena completely hurt Stefan, torn him, and hurt him. Including Damon, do you really think Elena deserves Stefan? She’s exactly like Damon, whiny, bitchy, demanding, care less, self-centered, and selfish. That’s why she belongs with Damon.

      Katherine is so much better than annoying Elena, do you really want to repeat Stefan always trying to save Elena? Her whining about it and having breakdowns, and than complaining to Damon about it? Do you. I for one do not.

      Katherine is completely changing, we are seeing a different, yet gentle side of her. She’s actually helping people out, and becoming more humane, tamed, and caring and compassionate it. And Stefan saw that when she she got rid of Gregor, when Nadia said “Rot in hell” watch Stefan’s face, he’s seeing a new side of her, and an interest in her. Moron. She saved Jeremy and Matt from Silas, she bonded with Nadia, she got rid of the passenger in Matt, she saved Nadia’s life from Gregor, she bonded with Caroline and helped Caroline, and she’s starting to thank people.

      Stefan is torn, and the one who actually is properly helping him, rather than making it about themselves is Katherine, she went through what he went through, she challenges him and puts him in a new light, and there is a lot of tension between the two. Unlike Stefan and Elena, he acts like her bodyguard, and can never have fun with her, he’s very mature, and boring around her. Katherine brings out the side of Stefan when he was human (like Caroline) a fun, joking, lovable side. Which Elena does NOT, she complains and regrets every day, and she’s NEVER thankful.

      You hate the fact that, Stefan overcame PSTD because of Katherine? You hate the idea of “Steferine” well if it wasn’t for Steferine, Katherine would be dead, Stefan would be suffering, and his PSTD would get worse and worse and worse. And nobody would care to help him.

      You’re delusional, SE is not as good as it use to be, Elena is selfish and ignorant. She belongs with Damon, Katherine is so much better than Elena, Steferine is stronger, and better. The writers just never gave them a chance because of the dumb ass love triangle, if Steferine got together, the ratings would skyrocket, and peoples jaws would drop.

      The moment when he caught her got my head spinning, it was just perfect. Something we haven’t seen in so long.

  • Jellybean

    The end was so Creepy cuz of Damon’s flashbacks. Stay strong honey! *sounds like a mother* but I love Damon. My fav vamp. So excited of the new episode! But why on the 5th December? I will miss it at the next Thursday! xx

    • Gavin Walsh

      thanksgiving week all major shows take it off

    • Manxy

      They learnt their lesson when they aired the episode on Halloween, they didn’t generate many viewers because of this, so they know not to do it on Hoildays. Especially thanksgiving.

  • vanana

    Damon is the sexiest man alive so eat that watch a different show if you dont like it and dont comment and Klaus is a real man too i hope they give him a bigger part he makes the show everyone always wants to hurt him and he is always helping the ones that hurt him .he is crazy bad a%%, i love him !!him and Caroline need to get together not Stephen! ! Come on now!!love this show and hope there is way more to come

  • Gary65

    Stefan catching human Katherine like he did was another death knell for basic physics but, apart from that, great ep :)

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