American Horror Story: Coven episode 2, “Boy Parts” definitely made it clear that at the very least cojones were not in short supply.
Here are just a few of our observations of tonight’s episode:
- Is it a rule that guys in swamps wear flannel, look scruffy, and have poor grammar skills? We want to know.
- As Stevie Nicks croons Edge of Seventeen two alligator hunters end up alligator bait as the tables are turned, by you guessed it, an apparent immortal 17-year-old Misty. Ouch!
- Gone With the Wind jokes don’t seem to make an impression on Madame LaLaurie even though she looks like she is wearing Scarlet O’Hara’s curtains. Cue one backhanding. Just in case she still hasn’t figured out the Fiona means business, Jessica shoots her a if-looks-could-kill glare before leaving the room.
- Woah, the chicken isn’t the only thing that’s deep fried. Dare we even say “How Precious” ;)
- It seems to be a pre-req for the younger generation to call each other “bitch”
- Well the detective seems not to be buying the “I don’t know nothin ’bout killin dem boys on da bus” routine, and despite the confession with exacting details, he doesn’t believe the truth either.
- Now it’s time for Fiona to deal with the officers. Dude, just drink the water, it ain’t gonna end well.
- Finally Fiona lets go and BOOM the girls hit the wall. She’s definitely having an 11 morning on a “How Bad Is It” scale of 1-10.
- So if she’s a witch why does she need a lock pick?
- Resurrection time in the meat locker. Madison is one sick cookie. Run Zoe, run!
- They’re planning a Frankenstud! We can’t wait to see how this turns out.
- To have a baby, or to not have a baby, it looks like we are having the obligatory magic comes with a price conversation.
- Flashback time: immortality and lynching go together with a side helping of being buried alive.
- Frankenstud goes just about as well as you’d think it would. We’re dying to know what Fiona is going to do when she finds out. These girls clearly have the world’s slowest learning curve.
- Were these girls absent the day they taught blood, pentagrams, and dead bodies never end well. As far as unintended consequences go this was kind of an obvious one.
- Oops, the kid in the blue dress didn’t get the do not untie memo
- Sledgehammers, the Looney Tunes weapon of choice: funny and effective.
- So the Fountain of Youth is what this confrontation is all about? Really? We thought there would be more to it.
- More blood in a circle, though round two is definitely sexier in a gummy worms grow into rattlesnakes and then make a baby kind of way.
- Why is Zoe trying to reason with Frankenstud? What leads her to believe that the drooling, cobbled together mass slamming her dashboard has an IQ greater than a glow-worm?
- Always check the backseat! Defensive Driving 101!
- Sing it Stevie! It’s Rhiannon this time to underscore the exposition. Stevie is a white witch. Wonder how Stevie feels about that.
- Someone needs to give Zoe a serious lesson in classic rock of the 1970’s and 1980’s.
- Well we have another stud, this one is more like a minotaur. Odds are 100 to 1 that the minotaur takes out Frankenstud.
- Heart-to-heart conversations on the bench, it’s hard to say what’s more offensive Madame LaLaurie bigotry or failing at being mother of the year.
- Why is no one outside? It’s broad daylight on a rainy day. Is everyone scared of water?
We want to hear your thoughts on this topic!
Write a comment below or submit an article to Hypable.