One of the unheralded perks of being both the head writer and lead actress on a television show is being able to choose one’s romantic interests. And Tina Fey may have taken better advantage of this privilege than anyone else during 30 Rock’s six+ seasons on air.
Liz Lemon’s collection of love interests is basically a who’s who of awesome dudes in Hollywood playing truly excellent characters. So with 30 Rock’s final season in full swing and Liz Lemon looking closer and closer to settling down, we thought it was time to pay tribute to this impressive stable of Y-chromosones by ranking Liz Lemon’s best lovers…and yes, that word bums us out unless it’s between the words “meat” and “pizza.”
Each hunk was rated on a scale of five in three categories: “Awesomeness of Actor,” “Likability of Character” and “Compatibility with Liz” and ranked by their composite score. Because really, not bringing numbers into this would be a non-objective outrage.
Awesomeness of Actor: 2, Likability of Character: 2, Compatibility with Liz: 2 = 6
Dennis Duffy is by almost any known measure an absolutely awful boyfriend. He is, however, certainly a fun character and Liz may have had more legitimate onscreen smiles with Dennis than any other squeeze. Still, if appearing on To Catch a Predator isn’t a dealbreaker, we don’t know what is.
Awesomeness of Actor: 3, Likability of Character: 3, Compatibility with Liz: 1 = 7
Steven Black and Liz have absolutely nothing in common. It’s a testament to Dennis’ general awfulness that Steven doesn’t get the bottom spot. If accidentally shooting someone is symbolic of repressed romantic feelings though, then maybe Liz and Steven still have a shot. Oh, it isn’t? Moving on.
Awesomeness of Actor: 4, Likability of Character: 3, Compatibility with Liz: 2 = 9
James Franco and his charming, um, “pillow friend?” may end up being the only one-night-stand Liz has during the show’s run. If you’re only going to do something once, it might as well be with James Franco and an anthropomorphized pillow.
Awesomeness of Actor: 5, Likability of Character: 3, Compatibility with Liz: 1 = 9
It’s a testament to how awesome Peter Dinklage is that Stewart even charts on this list. He and Liz’s courtship was a little wacky at best, and disturbingly Freudian at worst.
Awesomeness of Actor: 4, Likability of Character: 4, Compatibility with Liz: 1 = 9
Wesley Snipes may have been an even worse match than Steven Black for Liz, but man were their interactions hilarious. And for a show that seemed to inch toward the notion that romantic love doesn’t exist for awhile there, the deceptively-named Wesley Snipes and Liz may have had a good stalemate of a relationship going.
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